Former Arsenal defender Emmanuel Eboue has revealed he has contemplated suicide.
The Ivorian is currently serving a one-year ban from all football activity after failing to pay money owed to a former agent.
There have been attempts to settle the matter but Eboue, who was on Sunderland’s books before the ban, fears he will not play again.
Earlier this year, Eboue’s family were also rocked by the deaths of his brother N’Dri Serge and his grandfather.
The 33-year old admits the developments left him at rock-bottom, without the release of the game he loves.
“This is the lowest I’ve been in my career, it’s a bad time. There are a lot of days when I don’t feel like getting out of bed. One day I wanted to kill myself. My family keep me strong,” he told the Telegraph.
Eboue has also revealed that he he is in regular contact with Didier Drogba – but he has not heard from former teammate Kolo Toure or the Ivorian Football Federation.
The Celtic defender was banned for failing a drugs test while at Manchester City and Eboue says he was always in contact.
“All of them are my big brothers. I know they know my problem but I hope one day they will call me. Of course it’s disappointing.” the former Arsenal defender added.
“I thought the friendship was stronger. You have to be friends in difficult times. But that’s life. I take it in a good way.
Eboue is now training with non-league Enfield Town in a bid to maintain his fitness and regularly visits Arsenal’s academy, where son Mathis is on the books.